Learning to achieve self-love

Throughout my whole life, I have always wondered what self-love was and how to achieve that to live a more peaceful life.

I constantly see people struggle with that, so I wanted to share my understanding of this specific topic and hard process, and hopefully help whoever feels like a failure and not worthy of a successful life and career.

This post is for everyone who has ever struggled with self-love and self-worth since I am pretty sure all of us have had at least once in our lives difficulties showing love to ourselves and the feeling of not being ‘good enough’, but for what?

During my whole journey and while growing up, I have learnt what is important to remember to achieve total self-love.

Although I am still in the middle of a healing process, I feel like it is essential for everyone to always speak up and be aware of all the little steps that have been achieved so far.

Let’s keep in mind every single one of us deals with issues differently; every healing process is different from another, it is not always linear, and it might sometimes seem slow or even nonexistent, making you constantly switch between feeling up and down, but it does eventually get better.

Sometimes I used to look around at beautiful and successful people thinking how badly I wanted to be like them, ignore every negative and intrusive thought in my head, and live the "perfect life" they seem to live. So I have always wondered: how do they even do it? How do they look so confident and good with themselves all the time?

I have wanted to feel good and happy like they always appeared to me, even though not everything we see is real, especially what we see on the internet.

However, I have wanted to achieve this state of mind, and I never thought it would be possible until I found some little tips.

I have struggled with many things my whole life, especially during my teenage years, and that I sometimes still struggle with, but practising these tips eventually helped me.

1. Allow yourself to feel things fully, both pain and happiness

2. Stop comparing yourself to others

3. Don’t worry about other people’s opinions and expectations of you

4. Don’t be scared of letting go of people who are not good for you

5. Put yourself and your health first

6. Be kind to yourself and others; the kindness you give to other people will always come back to you

These six points are extremely important to achieve total self-love and to stop negativity from entering your life.

I have listed all these things in a specific order because that is the order in which I have learned to protect my energy, process my fears, and put myself first.

In the beginning, it will be hard to understand that you and your health matter and that your feelings are valid.

Trying to change old habits into sane habits, speaking up, understanding your mistakes and having to remove some people’s presence from your life is not always easy but slowly and eventually, everything will be alright. It will all come naturally with growth and you will notice a positive impact on your life coming from the biggest achievement and gift you could ever bless yourself with, and from which you will always benefit in your whole life; self-love.

Serena